


critrole rarepair week

by hadrons_collide



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, F/F, Flower Crowns, Fluff, Friendship, Gen, M/M, Multi, One Shot Collection, Pokemon GO - Freeform, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-12
Updated: 2016-08-06
Packaged: 2018-07-23 13:21:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,983
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7464897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hadrons_collide/pseuds/hadrons_collide
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Seven one-shots for Critical Role RarePair Week</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. a non-romantic pairing: Gilmore & Allura, G

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Day One- Non-Romantic pairing: Gilmore and Allura bond over the downside of loving adventurers. Because gay magic users are sorta my jam and I think these two could be the best of friends.
> 
> (I'm a little behind but I should hopefully be able to catch up tomorrow!)

Gilmore has known Allura for years- they are, of course, the two most prominent magic users in Emon outside the Lyceum – but he’s pretty sure they’ve never really talked about anything other than magic until she shows up in his shop, unannounced. Allura’s important enough that she usually sends a message- or what she usually needs requires Gilmore to prepare a potion, or find a spell, and really, he does appreciate a good heads up for things of that nature. So it’s a bit jarring when he pushes through the curtain and sees the arcanist flipping through a basic alchemy book.

“Lady Allura!” Gilmore exclaims, taking her hand and kissing it. “Did I miss a message from you, darling? I know you could have written that book you’re holding, so you’re clearly not here for that.”

Allura smiles and sets the book down. “I was in the area and I figured I’d stop by. Have a chat?”

He knows there’s nothing in the area she would really be interested in, but Gilmore lets it pass, more intrigued by Allura’s presence. He gestures towards the back. “Shall we, then?”

She accepts the cup of tea he makes, waving off his apologies of being underprepared. “I doubt you have anyting that isn’t the best,” she assures him, tapping her fingers on the edge of her cup. She almost looks nervous, and that intrigues Gilmore even more.

“So, Allura, you wanted to chat?”

She nods and takes a sip of her tea. “I… You have a working relationship with Vox Machina, yes?”

Gilmore smiles and nods, Vax’s face flashing through his mind. “Of course! I sponsor them for a discount, provided they spread the name of Gilmore’s Glorious Goods wherever their adventures take them.”  
“Well, I sent them to Kraghammer a few days ago.” Her fingers tap on the cup again. “You haven’t heard from them, have you?”

He raises an eyebrow. “If you sent them, don’t you think they’d return to you first?”

“Yes, I suppose…” She sets down her cup and smoothes out one of her braids. “It’s just, it’s been a few days, and I was hoping to at least hear word from Kraghammer that they arrived or had found anything out…”

“If the stories Vax’ildan tells me are even half true, I assure you, they’re well up to whatever task you sent them on.” Gilmore pauses, trying to read Allura’s face, but all he can see is worry. “Do you mind me asking what you sent them for? I assume they aren’t just delivering a message or buying fine Dwarven crafts?”

Allura finally smiles at that. “They’re looking for someone. My… Lady Kima of Vord.”

The pause before Kima’s name is one Gilmore is all too familiar with, a pause he’s used so many times. The pause when you’re not sure exactly what word to use to describe someone you love- not because you don’t know, but because you’re not sure how someone else will react. It’s a feeling that ate at Gilmore for years, until he decided he didn’t care what anyone else thought of him. 

He tries to give Allura his most supportive smile. “I’ve seen her around town, I think. Halfling, heavy armor?”

Allura’s face brightens. “She almost never takes it off! It’s ridiculous, and I’ve told her that a thousand times. But if it keeps her alive on her adventures, that’s all that matters, I suppose.”

“Oh, the perils of loving adventures,” Gilmore says with an overdramatic sigh. “I myself once loved the most adventurous young rogue. He would sneak his way into tombs and hidden ruins, disarm any traps, and bring me the most incredible artifacts.” He pauses for a moment, twisting one of the many rings he wore, remembering the man who brought it to him. “But anything he brought me was always second to the joy in my heart when he walked through my doorway after being gone.”

“What happened to him?” Allura asks.

“Sometimes, people aren’t meant to be together forever.” Gilmore says simply. He reaches for Allura’s hand, giving it a friendly squeeze. “I will tell you one thing, though. If Vox Machina is looking for Lady Kima, they’ll bring her home safely. I’m sure of it.”

Allura squeezes his hand back and stands up to leave. “Thank you, Gilmore. I needed a friend today.”

“Well, you’ll always have one here.” Allura’s smile is so genuine that Gilmore can’t help but lean forward and embrace her. “If I hear anything from Kraghammer, you’ll be the first to know.”

“Thank you,” she says again. She smoothes out her robes and when she reaches the door, she turns back to Gilmore. “Feel free to stop by my tower any time for tea.”

“I just might take you up on that. Until then, Lady Allura.” Gilmore smiles as she leaves his store. This seems like the start of a beautiful friendship.


	2. a f/f pairing: vex/keyleth, T

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Day 2- a f/f pairing, I wanted to write a million different Vexleth things but I settled on this one. Almost caught up!

The next time Scanlan makes the mansion, they go back to the hot springs. No boys, no cannonball contests, no interruptions. Just Vex, Keyleth, and a whole evening of relaxation and fun.

“You’re sure no one will know we came down here?” Keyleth asks, dipping a toe into the hot springs to test out the water. Vex starts peeling her armor off, and Keyleth has to quickly remind herself that she can actually stare, that she’s seen Vex naked before, that this is something she’s allowed to want.

(She’s still not really sure what she’s doing all the time, not really sure what to do with her hands, but Vex? Gods, Vex knows exactly what to do with her hands.)

“I cast Pass Without a Trace on us before we came down here, so we should have been pretty stealthy. And Trinket’s guarding the door, so if anyone comes down here, we’ll know.” She catches Keyleth’s eye after she pulls her shirt over her head and winks. “Enjoying the show, darling?”

Keyleth blushes a little. “Well, yeah, I mean… you’re beautiful.”

Vex laughs as the last of her clothes come off. “Yes, and so are you.” She walks over to Keyleth and kisses her, fingers tangling in the cloth of Keyleth’s armor. “Now get this off and get in here!” With that, she runs towards the water and dives gracefully in. Keyleth strips down quickly, just in time for Vex to splash her from the water. “Keyleth, come on!”

Keyleth jumps in feet first, splashing as little as possible as she slips under the water. She surfaces next to Vex, popping up just quickly enough to give her a kiss on the cheek before diving back under the water again.

“How did you sneak up on me?” she hears Vex shout from the surface. “Keyleth, where’d you go?”

Keyleth comes up on Vex’s other side this time, kissing her on that cheek. “You did cast Pass Without a Trace on us, remember?”

“Last time I ever do that, then!” She smiles before letting the water lift her up, floating up on her back. Keyleth follows suit, reaching for Vex and linking their fingers together as they float around the springs.

They float like that for a while, hand in hand around the springs. It’s calming, peaceful, and Keyleth suspects the warmth she feels throughout her whole body has more to do with Vex’s presence than the water temperature.

Eventually, Vex gets bored of floating and drags Keyleth to the shallow edge of the pool. “Darling, this has all been very relaxing,” she says, pinning Keyleth to the wall. “But you know what else is very relaxing?” She raises an eyebrow and trails one of her hands down Keyleth’s body, past her breasts, her naval, down underneath the water between her legs.

Keyleth smiles and wraps her arms around Vex’s neck before kissing her. “Sounds like just what I need.”


	3. a m/m pairing: percy/jarett, M

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Day Three- a m/m pairing: Percy/Jarett, when everyone else is off being cows and Percy is being angsty in his workshop. I listened to "I'm Not Okay (I Promise)" on a loop while writing this and uh, it probably shows. Whoops! This is short and vaguely smutty but also not really, comparatively.

“I doubt this is what Lady Vex’ahlia had in mind when she asked me to keep an eye on you,” Jarett says amusedly, bent over a table in Percy’s workshop.

Percy’s chuckle turns into a moan when he thrusts again. “No, probably not.”

He’s not exactly sure how they got here. The whole day’s been a bit of a blur- apart from the pile of bullets he apparently made, everything in his memory is a bit hazy up until twenty or so minutes ago. Jarett had been back and forth most of the day, between his workshop and where they were keeping the boy who’d worked for the Briarwoods. He assumes Jarett must have picked the lock- which is pretty impressive, honestly, since he’d tried to design a lock he thought even Vax couldn’t pick.

It’s still a bit fuzzy after that, but he definitely remembers Jarett jokingly asking if he needed “something else to pound.” It was cheesy and sounded like something that came straight out of one of the erotic novels Vex thinks she hid in her room, and maybe that’s why it works. Maybe that’s why Percy kissed him, pinned him against the wall, why Jarett tore at his shirt and rocked his hips against Percy’s.

Regardless, though, they’re here now- Percy buried in Jarett, sweat on his brow, the guard moaning beneath him. It’s been a shockingly long time since Percy’s actually had sex, with men or women, so he’s not really surprised by quickly he finishes, followed shortly by Jarett. He actually collapses on the table next to Jarett, completely exhausted between sex and whatever the hell it was he was doing in here all day.

“I won’t tell her about this,” Jarett says, breath coming in heavy pants. “Lady Vex’ahlia, I mean.”

“I think that’s for the best,” Percy agrees. 

“And the smoke coming out of the room… I won’t tell her about that, either.”

Percy sits up with a jolt. “What smoke?”

Jarett furrows his brow. “When I broke the lock? There was smoke coming from underneath the door, so I assumed there was a fire of some sort.” He gives Percy a concerned look. “There wasn’t a fire when I came in here, but the smoke was- it was all around you, then it went away.”

“Oh. Right. That smoke.” Percy runs a hand through his hair, trying to come up with a quick explanation for something he absolutely could not explain. “I was… trying out something new with the black powder. Long range explosives. Didn’t work. Can’t believe I forgot about it.”

He thinks it sounds like a fairly convincing lie, but he’s also pretty sure Jarett sees right through it. “All right,” he says finally. “Forgive me for asking, but- are you okay?”

Percy has to think about that for a moment. Truth be told, he hasn’t been okay since the Briarwoods took his home from him, and he’d been even less okay since they came barreling back into his life. “I don’t think so,” he says honestly.

The concern is still on Jarett’s face as he reaches for Percy, giving his shoulder a squeeze. “If you ever need me- for anything- you know where to find me, right?”

Percy nods and watches as Jarett dresses. “Thank you,” he says before the guard leaves. “And, about the- the last thing. Don’t tell Vex that, either.”

Jarett gives him a sad smile from the doorway. “My lips are sealed.”


	4. fluff: Vex/Keyleth, Gilmore/Vax, G

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Day 4- fluff. This originally started as "Vex and Keyleth make flower crowns for each other because girlfriends" and then it evolved into almost 1500 words with bonus Vaxmore and honestly as someone who wears flower crowns at least once a week irl I'm so glad that this is the one I went crazy on. Flowers for everyone! Vague spoilers through episode 58 I think.

It’s honestly an understatement to say that flowers are Keyleth’s thing. Sure, she’s a druid, and nature is kind of her domain. But to Vex, Keyleth is actual sunshine personified, the brightest of the bunch, the light of Vex’s life, and she just wants to find some damn flowers for her girlfriend, okay?

It shouldn’t be this hard, honestly. Whitestone’s thriving now, especially after Keyleth helped restore the crops. Even in winter, things are blooming, and Vex is honestly shocked that there isn’t a single merchant in the ever-growing marketplace around the Sun Tree selling flowers.

She tracks down Cassandra first. She’s essentially the ruler of Whitestone, so theoretically she should know everything about the city and its surrounding areas. But when Vex finds her, Cassandra is less than helpful.

“Flowers, Vex? Really? You think I have time for flowers?” She pinches her nose in a way that reminds Vex so much of Percy it’s almost scary. “There’s a weird magical black hole under my city, there are dragons attacking the world, and Ripley’s still out there somewhere!”

“Oh. Sorry for wasting your time.”

Cassandra sighs, her face softening. “Look, I just… I haven’t had time for things like that. Why don’t you just ask Keyleth?”

Vex chuckles. “I’m actually trying to surprise Keyleth. Asking her would kind of defeat the purpose.”

Cassandra gives Vex a small smile. “Maybe ask Gilmore or Allura? I’m sure either one of them would know.”

 

She finds Allura with Kima, down by the Sun Tree. They’re walking together and browsing the marketplace, Allura’s hand resting on Kima’s shoulder as they walk. Vex smiles to herself and decides to let them have their time together.

 

Gilmore, as always, is a little harder to track down. It’s a lot easier to find Vax, sulking about near the Raven Queen temple Zahra is helping Percy put together.

“Where’s Gilmore, brother?” she asks, getting right to the point. It’s almost mid-afternoon, and she wants to have the flowers for Keyleth before dinner tonight.

Vax sighs. “Why does everyone always come to me wanting to know where Gilmore is?”

“Maybe it’s because you’re _fucking_ him,” Vex says, giving him a pointed look.

Vax makes a face, feigning offense. “No need to be crass, Vex’ahlia!”

It’s Vex’s turn to sigh. “Fine. Oh dearest twin brother of mine, who is so wonderful and stealthy and saved me from certain death, could you _please_ tell me where to find your dearest, darling Gilmore?”

“All you had to do was ask nicely,” Vax says with a grin. “He’s at the Ziggurat, which you probably could’ve figured out yourself, Stubby!”

Vex sticks her tongue out at him and heads down to the Ziggurat.

 

She actually runs into Gilmore leaving as she’s heading down under the castle, and he smiles widely when he sees her. “Vex’ahlia! How lovely to see you”

“Gilmore!” she says, matching his smile. “I was actually looking for you.”

He raises an eyebrow. “Really? Because you’ve been avoiding me the past week.”

“I know,” Vex says with a sigh. “And I suppose we can talk about it on our way to the flowers?”

Gilmore’s other eyebrow goes up. “Flowers?”

“Yes, flowers, I just want to make a stupid flower crown for Keyleth, but nobody has flowers and everybody said you might know where they are, and if you don’t want to take me there because it’s weird now that you and Vax are together, it’s fine, but I just want some fucking flowers!”

Gilmore just looks at her for a moment, then offers her his arm. “So let’s get you some flowers.”

 

He takes her to a field about ten minutes out of town, and when they reach the field Vex can’t help but smile. Because Keyleth has clearly been here, that much is obvious. The entire field is covered in flowers of all colors, blooming fully regardless of the chill in the air. It’s beautiful, as beautiful as anything Keyleth could make, and Vex feels her heart swell.

“Oh, Keyleth,” she says with a smile, crouching down to pick a tall stem with a small pink flower at the end. “Thanks for bringing me here, Gilmore. If you need to head back into town-“

Gilmore laughs and picks one blue flower, then another, slightly darker. “Nonsense, Vex’ahlia. I want you to show me how to make one of these flower crowns.” He pauses, picking a lighter blue flower. “Plus, we do need to talk about your brother.”

Vex nods at him, picking yellows, pinks, reds- colors she thinks will go well with Keyleth’s hair. “Wait, are you making _Vax_ a flower crown?”

Gilmore shrugs. “Why not? You’re making one for Keyleth.”

Vex bursts into laughter. “Yes, but Keyleth lives for flowers. Vax? Gods, I can hear him now. _I’m the champion of a death goddess, Gilmore, I can’t wear flowers!_ ” 

Gilmore laughs as well. “Well, I’m going to make him one anyways,” he says, continuing to pick blue flowers. “I think blue would suit him well, yes?” He asks, holding up a bunch to Vex’s face.

“It’s definitely our best color,” she agrees. Vex pauses, picks a few more flowers, then turns back to Gilmore. “You suit him well, too, Gilmore.” He raises an eyebrow and lets her continue. “I think the reason I’ve been so wary is that Vax isn’t a happy person. He has an actual death wish, you know, and now with this Raven Queen… it’s just strange to me, that’s all. I’m not used to it, but I think I like it.”

Gilmore doesn’t say anything for a few minutes, and they collect flowers in silence. “If you hurt him,” Vex says when she thinks she’s picked enough. “If you do anything to make him unhappy in any way, I will hurt you.” She realizes the threat is a little less harsh with an armful of flowers, but she makes her toughest face regardless.

Gilmore laughs in response. “Vex’ahlia, dear, I don’t plan on doing anything that would make him unhappy. But I’ll keep that in mind, regardless.”

Vex smiles and sits down among the flowers, dropping her collection in front of her and beginning to weave them together. Gilmore watches her, and it takes a few tries for him to get it started, but he’s remarkably quick to pick it up. She remembers just how long it took Keyleth to teach her- though, to be fair, she was still pretty early into her crush on Keyleth at that point, and Vex was more interested in the way Keyleth’s hands felt in hers than the actual crown-making process. After a time, though, they have two very adequate flower crowns, and Gilmore offers Vex his arm again as they head back to Whitestone.

They find Vax first, still sulking about around the Raven Queen’s temple. “Oh, good, the two of you made up, then?”

“Of course,” Gilmore says, taking the crown of blue flowers from Vex’s hand. “And that’s not all we made.”

Vex stifles a giggle as he places the crown on Vax’s head, smoothing out his hair underneath it. “Flowers? Gilmore, I can’t wear flowers, I’m the champion of a goddess of death!” She gives Gilmore an “I told you so” look before heading into the castle to look for Keyleth.

She hides the crown behind her back as she knocks on the door, peeking her head in. “Keyleth, darling, are you in here?” 

“Yeah, come in,” Keyleth says from inside. Vex finds her bent over her alchemy supplies. “I was trying to make a resistance potion, but it’s not gonna happen today.”

Vex leans down and kisses her on the cheek. “Well, maybe this will cheer you up.” She gently pulls Keyleth’s circlet from her head and replaces it with the flower crown she made.

Keyleth’s hand goes up to her hair immediately, then runs to the mirror on the other side of the room. “Flowers? Oh, Vex, they’re beautiful.” Vex goes to Keyleth and lets the druid pull her in for a kiss, enjoying the feeling of Keyleth smiling against her lips. “Are these my flowers?” she asks.

Vex nods. “Gilmore took me to your little field,” she explains.

“Yeah,” Keyleth muses. “It’s where I go when I’m sad, or, you know, frustrated. I go and I just sort of lay there and make flowers. It’s calming.”

Vex takes Keyleth’s hands in her own. “Can I go with you next time? I totally understand if you want to be alone when you’re upset, I get it, but… I love you, Keyleth, and I’m always here for you.”

Keyleth smiles and druidcrafts a small blue flower, tucking it into Vex’s braid. “Only if you make me another one of these beautiful flower crowns when we go.”

Vex smiles back. “Deal.”


	5. an au: keyleth/vax/percy, college au, T

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Day 6- an AU. I went with college AU, the best AU, my ultimate weakness apart from fake relationship, which is why this is almost 1900 words long. I know I missed a day, I know rarepair week is technically over, but I had ideas and I plan on writing all of them, so hopefully I'll get around to it fairly quickly. I have a soft spot for Percy/Vax/Keyleth so have these three in a universe I definitely have even more ideas for.

Percy’s studying and smoking on the couch when Vax walks in. “Ugh, today was horrible,” he complains, collapsing onto the couch on top of Percy. “Why do I ever actually go to class?”

Percy grabs his thermodynamics textbook from underneath Vax, setting it instead on Vax’s chest. “Because that’s the entire point of college?”

Vax sighs overdramatically and steals the cigarette from Percy’s lips. “No, the point of college was getting away from my asshole father on his money. Fuck the rest of it.” He throws up two middle fingers just for the hell of it and Percy laughs despite himself.

“Anything particularly horrible happen today, or just the usual horrors of having to get out of bed and walk across campus?” He pulls his cigarettes from his pocket and lights another for himself. Keyleth won’t be home from her internship at the vet’s office for at least half an hour, so he’s got enough time to smoke one before she comes home and yells at him.

“I mean, when you put it that way, it was truly awful,” Vax says. “Had a quiz in French, probably failed that, and on the way out of that stupid Renaissance history class you and Keyleth made me take, Professor Gilmore stopped me and told me he was looking forward to reading my essay tomorrow morning. What the fuck does that even mean?”

“An essay is when you write a certain amount on a single topic, usually for analysis or exposition,” Percy says dryly.

Vax reaches up and swats at Percy’s head. “No need to be a smartass, Percival. But why would he single me out like that? It’s weird, right?”

Percy shrugs, flipping to the next page in his textbook. Maybe once Keyleth gets home, Vax can bother her and let him study in peace. Probably not, though. “Perhaps he was intrigued by the complete stranger in his class. I don’t know, Vax’ildan,” he says, matching Vax’s tone from when he used Percy’s full name. “What I do know, before you even ask, is that I’m not writing that essay for you.”

Vax’s face falls into a full pout instantly. “C’mon, Percy, you took the class last semester! It’ll be so easy.” He sits up and slides his hand onto Percy’s thigh, voice low and seductive as he leans into Percy’s ear. “I’ll make it up to you.”

Percy snorts out a laugh and goes back to his studying. “You’ll have more luck on that line with Professor Gilmore. I’ve got an electronics lab report and statics homework to do tonight, and I’ve got a thermo exam on Monday. I don’t have time to write you an essay.”

“Wait,” Vax says. “Are you suggesting that I seduce Professor Gilmore to get out of writing my paper?”

He opens his mouth to say no, absolutely not, why would I tell my boyfriend to seduce his professor, that’s ridiculous. But Percy also thinks about the amount of work he has to get done, how he really needs to get a good grade in thermo to snag a research position in the fall, and just for a moment, he considers telling Vax it’s fine.

Unfortunately, Vax takes that moment as confirmation, and he grins widely. “You have the best plans, Percy, honestly. Do you think that would work for all my classes? I mean, my psych professor is a 60 year old woman, so maybe not that one, but…”

Percy pinches the bridge of his nose and shakes his head. “Well, thank god I’m not the only person in this relationship. Keyleth will never stand for this.”

“Keyleth will never stand for what?” She asks from the doorway, and Percy jumps at least a foot in the air. “You smoking in the living room, Percy? Because I’m pretty sure I already told you not to do that.”

“Why would you teach her how to be sneaky?” Percy asks Vax as his breathing goes back to normal. “One of you scaring me to death on a regular basis was quite enough.”

Vax grins. “Because now she’s even more perfect.” He leans back against the couch to let Keyleth kiss him. “No stray animals today, Kiki?”

Keyleth shakes her head and Percy lets out an internal sigh of relief. Keyleth has a habit of bringing home stray animals brought into the vet clinic, and Vax never has the heart to tell her no. At one point, they had three cats, a dog, and a raven, which for some reason followed Vax around everywhere he went. A new temporary pet was the last thing they needed tonight.

“So, I take it the smoking wasn’t what you thought I was going to be mad about,” Keyleth says, leaning over Percy and grabbing the cigarette from him. She kisses him on the forehead before putting out the cigarette.

“You had Professor Gilmore for Renaissance History, too, right?” Keyleth nods and Vax’s smile widens. “I’m gonna blow my way out of a paper. Or more likely, any work in the class for the rest of the semester. Percy’s idea,” he adds when Keyleth’s jaw drops.

She glares at Percy. “Why?”

Percy sighs and sets his thermo book on the table. Odds are he won’t be getting much studying done anymore. “It was more something I said that Vax took completely out of context, and not in any way something I’m encouraging. But I do stand by what I said about not writing your essay for you, Vax. I’ve got my own shit to do. Write it yourself.” 

Keyleth stares Vax down. “Yeah. Write it yourself!” 

Vax snorts out a laugh, because they all know there’s no way Keyleth’s going to stand strong on that, especially since she’s interning and doesn’t have her own homework to use as an excuse. Percy stands and gathers his things, stopping on his way to the fridge to give Keyleth a kiss. “Stay strong, Keyleth. You can make him write that essay, I believe in you.”

She smiles her thanks as Percy grabs half a leftover pizza and an energy drink from the fridge. “I’ll be in my room if you really need me.” It’s less of his bedroom and more of a study these days, but it’s still somewhere that Percy knows he’ll only be disturbed for something important.

 

When Percy emerges two hours later, lab report completed, he finds Keyleth leaning on Vax’s shoulder, pointing at something in a textbook as he types on his laptop. “Thank god, you talked some sense into him.”

Keyleth smiles proudly. “We just finished the introduction!”

Percy pinches his nose again. “It’s been two hours,” he says, glaring at Vax. “You took two hours to write an introductory paragraph?”

“Well, to be fair, we spent the first hour on Facebook.” Percy glares even harder. “What? Keyleth had to play Farmville, and Vex is going on a date tomorrow night so I had to creep through this girl’s page and make sure she’s worthy of my sister.”

“Yeah, and then it looked like Zahra was into witchcraft?” Keyleth adds. “So we had to look a lot of stuff up on that to make sure she wasn’t going to use Vex for a weird ritual or something.”

“Yeah, Percy, we’ve only really been working for like, what? Twenty minutes?”

If Percy could glare any more, he would. Instead, he grabs a bag of chips from the pantry and tries to keep from throwing them at Vax. “I’ve got a lab report to write. If I come out when I’m done and you haven’t made significant progress-“

“You’ll write it for me?” Vax says with a smirk.

Percy gives him the finger and disappears back into his room.

 

To be fair to Vax and Keyleth, Percy can hear them talking about vaguely relevant things for a good hour or so. After that, the dull background noise fades, and after a good fifteen minutes of silence, Percy can’t help but wonder if they’re still working. He grabs his empty energy drink to at least give himself a vague excuse and pokes his head out the door. 

They’re definitely not working on the essay, and part of Percy wants to shout “I told you so” when he realizes it. But also not, because Vax’s shirt is on the floor and Keyleth’s hands are tangled in his hair, and Percy’s seen them kiss more times than he can count, but he’s always blown away by how perfectly Vax and Keyleth seem to slot together. Her hair falling in a copper curtain over Vax’s face, his hands tracing the flower tattoos that go up both of Keyleth’s arms, Keyleth’s soft gasp that Percy knows from experience means Vax rocked his hips just right against her.

He starts to close his door, to just go back and do his work and let them have their moment, but Vax’s ears pick up on everything. “Care to join in, Percival?”

“Depends. How much of your essay have you written?”

Vax smirks. “Two paragraphs. And they’re fucking fantastic. Of course, if you’d just let me blow Gilmore like we talked about, I wouldn’t even have to be writing anything.”

“Ugh, can we not talk about that while you’re on top of me?” Keyleth says.

“Since that’s out of the question,” Percy says, keeping his voice even and measured, now very aware of the fact that he’d changed into just boxers and a t-shirt. “Do those two paragraphs count the introduction you had written when I came out here before?”

Vax gets off the couch and walks towards Percy, and Percy knows the answer to his question is probably yes without Vax even telling him. Which Vax never does, because he pushes Percy against the door and kisses him.

Vax’s surprise kisses have gotten to be less and less surprising as their relationship has progressed, but there’s still not much better than being pressed into a wall and kissed senseless by the roommate he had a hopeless crush on just months ago. His tongue is in Percy’s mouth almost immediately, one hand cradling his neck while the other fumbles with the hem of his t-shirt.

“Vax,” he groans, Vax’s lips working their way down to suck a mark in his neck. “You need to write your paper.”

“I did,” Vax says, voice muffled against Percy’s skin. “I mean, I wrote some of it. And an outline. It’s practically done.” His hands move to play with the waistband of Percy’s boxers, and Percy has to hold back a moan. “Consider this a reward.”

Percy shoots a look of “help!” to Keyleth, who shrugs from the couch, lips curled into a smile as she watches them. “It’s midnight now,” he finally says. “If we hook up now, you have to promise you’re going to finish writing that essay tonight.”

“Of course, Percival,” Vax says, kissing Percy again. “I promise.”

 

(It’s four in the morning before they’re done, and Percy will have to finish the last of his problem set before class, but Keyleth and Percy eventually finish Vax’s essay while he sprawls out on the bed between them, offering an occasional sentence or two. At the end of the day, Vax may be a lazy little shit, but he’s their lazy little shit.)  


	6. free for all: percy/vax, G

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Day 7 - free for all; when I started playing Pokemon Go, I made a [Vox Machina + Pokemon Go headcanons post](http://orlaisbians.tumblr.com/post/147570612636/vox-machina-pokemon-go) to specifically keep myself from writing fic about it and I failed miserably. So here's Percy and Vax going on a Pokemon adventure/date, which I was originally going to post as part of rarepair week and it's been 84 years but I'm still posting it here anyways. And I'll eventually write the angst one, too.

“Why do we have to go all the way down to the promenade to find Pokemon?” Percy asks, pulling into the parking deck. “There are perfectly good Pokemon near our apartment. I’ve caught at least twenty Pidgey.” He glances over at Vax, eyes glued to his phone. “God, Vax, have you already started?”

Vax gives him a guilty look. “Listen, there’s a Pokestop in the garage, okay? I need to stock up before we go out!”

Percy shakes his head and grabs his own phone. “Fine. Let me hit it, then we’ll go.”

“Not the first time you’ve said that,” Vax says with a smirk. He grabs his backpack from the floorboard before they leave the car. “Ready, Percy? Scanlan and Grog are already down in the park at the gym.”

“Yeah, Pike just texted me, she’s on her way with Vex and Keyleth.”

Vax raises an eyebrow. “Keyleth’s coming? I thought she was less into Pokemon than you.”

“You know how much she loves the park,” Percy replies. “And I’m not… not into Pokemon. I like it a perfectly normal amount, unlike the rest of you.”

Vax grins and laces his fingers through Percy’s. “Oh, just you wait, Percival. There’s no way you won’t love it after tonight.”

 

The promenade is completely insane. Percy knew people went there to look for Pokemon- the twins had gone almost every night this week- but he didn’t expect it to be anything like this. Everywhere he looks, he sees groups of two or more people around their age, holding their phones out and staring at the screens, walking around in little circles.

“See, there are three Pokestops you can get from right over here,” Vax says, tugging Percy down past a group of high schoolers yelling about a Caterpie.

“Hey, I needed that!” Percy says as the bug disappears from his phone.

“Don’t worry, dear, you’ll see a hundred more tonight.” Vax squeezes his hand and drags a vaguely distraught Percy further down the promenade to where Scanlan and Grog are.

“Hey, guys,” Vax says. Grog waves, but Scanlan doesn’t even look up from his phone. “Gym battle, Scanlan?”

He nods as Percy looks back down at his phone. “There aren’t any Pokemon around,” he says, swiping his finger across each of the Pokestops. Percy’s phone buzzes as he hits the last one. “Oh, hang on, there’s a Pidgey!” His face breaks into a grin as he goes to catch it.

“You’re still catching Pidgey?” Grog asks.

“Gotta get stardust and XP,” Scanlan says, eyes still glued to his phone as he taps furiously at the screen. 

Vax smiles and rests his head on Percy’s shoulder. “Percy hasn’t gotten a Pidgeot yet. No, don’t evolve the one you just caught, wait to evolve your Pidgeotto,” he says, touching Percy’s screen. “Is that really the highest CP you have?”

Percy shrugs. “I’m only level seven.”

“Which is why we’re out here, so you can catch everything and level up!” Vax turns back to Grog and Scanlan. “I take it you’re staying here?”

Scanlan finally looks up to glare at someone behind Percy. “Yeah, some Team Mystic punks just took this gym from me and Grog, so we’ve gotta get it back.”

Percy turns and follows Scanlan’s gaze to a group of teenage girls. “Really? Them?”

He nods and looks back at his phone. “Fucking CP 2100 Lapras,” he mutters.

Vax laughs. “We’re gonna take a couple laps around the promenade, then. See you in a bit.” He takes Percy’s hand as they walk off. “Let me know if anything pops up for you, okay?”

Percy’s phone buzzes just then, and Vax looks at Percy and back down at his own phone. “I’ve just got that Pidgey you just caught, so-“

“It’s Keyleth,” Percy explains, reading the text. “The girls went to Gilmore’s for a drink before they walk around.”

“Well, good luck with that,” Vax says with a laugh. “It’s hard enough to catch high level Pokemon sober, let alone…”

He trails off and looks down at his phone. “Oh, fuck yes, a Magikarp!”

“Isn’t that the dead fish one?” Percy asks, frowning at his own phone. “I don’t see it, but there’s a purple snake? I haven’t seen that one before.” He taps the Pokemon and grins when he sees its name. “Ekans? Oh, that’s clever!”

“It evolves into Arbok,” Vax explains. 

It takes Percy a second, and then he laughs. “Did Scanlan name all these?”

Vax laughs too. “Sometimes, I think he might. C’mon, let’s keep walking. You’ve got an egg going, right?”

“Yeah, it should be almost-“ He pauses, going to check the tab, and then the egg pops up on his phone. “Oh, wait, I think it’s hatching now! It says 5.0 of 5.0.”

Vax looks over his shoulder. “No, you’ve gotta walk around until it actually hatches. It’ll pop up, just walk circles or something.”

So Percy starts walking around in a circle, waiting for the egg to go from 4.97 to 5.0. The counter just doesn’t seem to change, and Vax laughs at him as he gets more and more frustrated. “Why isn’t anything happening?”

Vax shrugs, concentrating on catching something on his phone. “Sometimes you just have to ignore it and it’ll happen on its own.”

Percy sighs and grabs Vax’s hand. “Fine. Let’s find the girls, then.” 

They walk a few more minutes, stopping to get a pokestop and catch an Eevee, and then Percy’s phone buzzes in his hand. “Oh, it’s hatching!” He watches his screen until the egg cracks, and a Gastly pops out. “Gastly- I don’t think I have that one?”

“Oh my god, seriously?” Vax asks, peeking over Percy’s shoulder again. “It’s the perfect Pokemon for you.”

Percy looks at it. It’s a little ghost with smoke all around it. “I mean, I guess?”

Vax grins. “I named mine after you! I mean, you’re kind of emo and spooky and you’re white as a ghost, so…”

He laughs, considering it. “I mean, I guess it’s not the worst Pokemon to have named after me.” He pauses for a moment. “Wait, have you named Pokemon after all our friends?”

“Oh, absolutely,” Vax says, smirking. “I think the best one so far is the Jigglypuff I named after Scanlan because he’s always singing those stupid songs.”

“Is that the little pink fluffy one?” Vax nods and Percy laughs again. “Oh, that’s ridiculously perfect.”

They walk towards the next Pokestop after Vax reminds Percy to put another egg in his incubator, and then three people run past them. Percy frowns, watching them run, until one of them yells out “PIKACHU!!! THERE’S A PIKACHU!!!!”

Percy doesn’t pretend to know everything about Pokemon. Vax is an expert, and he’s got Percy started on playing the games on his old Game Boy Color, but he still has trouble recognizing Pokemon from the silhouettes. But he knows Pikachu, and he knows Vax still hasn’t even seen one, despite his obsessive playing of the game.

Vax looks at Percy for all of one second before breaking off into a sprint towards the crowd. Percy sighs and follows after him, although at more of a light jog. Vax is pacing when Percy reaches him. “Show up, show up, fucking show up…” he mutters.

Percy glances down at his phone right as Pikachu pops up on his map. “Oh, Vax, look, it’s here!” He taps on the Pokemon excitedly as Vax glares at him.

“Where the fuck are you, you little- oh, thank fuck,” Vax says, and Percy can’t help but laugh. “CP 302, oh my god…”

“Mine’s 125,” Percy says, swiping his finger up to catch it. “Gotcha! And on the first throw, too.”

Vax is too concentrated on catching his own Pikachu to glare at Percy, but he can imagine it. The one thing he’s gotten really good at with the game is catching Pokemon- he figured out the curveball trick after a couple of days, and he’s almost perfected it by now. He’s caught most of his Pokemon after throwing only one ball, two at the most, whereas Vax usually needs to throw three or four.

He makes a frustrated noise, and Percy turns to Vax. “Do you want me to catch it for you?”

“No!” Vax yells, then softens. “Sorry, I just… I want to catch them all myself.”

It’s understandable, and Percy wraps his arms around Vax’s waist to watch over his shoulder. “If I was one more fucking level I’d have Ultra Balls,” Vax mutters, alternating between berries and great balls. It takes him a couple minutes, but he finally catches the Pikachu, jumping in excitement.

“Nicely done,” Percy says, kissing him on the cheek. “And, you know, I was thinking. You named a Pokemon after me, right? I think I’m going to name my Pikachu after you.”

Vax stills for just a moment, like he has to take a moment for that to sink in, then turns around in Percy’s arms to wrap his arms around Percy’s neck. “How are you the best boyfriend ever?” he asks before kissing Percy.

Vex’s voice breaks them apart after a minute or so. “Gross,” she says, and Percy pulls away from Vax’s mouth to see her standing with Pike and Keyleth.

“We caught Pikachu,” Percy explains, somewhat apologetically. Keyleth’s eyes widen in excitement as she pulls up the app, but Vex just shrugs.

“I caught one this morning on the way to work,” she says nonchalantly. Vax throws up two middle fingers at her and Pike laughs. “And that’s exactly why I didn’t tell you.”

“Whatever. How was Gilmore’s?” Vax asks.

“He had Pokemon themed shots!” Keyleth exclaims, swaying a little bit on the spot. 

Pike laughs and leans against Keyleth. “Yeah, they were pretty good. We’re heading back to the fountain, Scanlan was complaining about Team Mystic taking over that gym and Vex and I were going to get in there and rub it in his face. Wanna come?”

Vax nods and laces his fingers through Percy’s. “Yeah, we need to get those Pokestops again anyways.”

“Because you wasted ten Pokeballs trying to catch Pikachu and need to restock,” Percy says with a grin.

“Okay, level seven.”

He looks down at his app. “Oh, actually, I leveled up catching that Pikachu! I’m level eight now.”

Vax shakes his head and drags Percy off to follow the girls. “C’mon, Percy. I bet I can get you to level ten before we go home tonight.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I named my Gastly Percy almost immediately upon catching it, and I also have a Jigglypuff (now a very strong Wigglytuff) named Scanlan. I have Pokemon named after all of VM and a bunch of NPCs but those two will always be the best to me. (My Vax is my strongest Jolteon and he dies a lot in gym battles which honestly seems fitting.)


End file.
